Honesty in relationships…

Honesty…how far is too far?

Everybody likes to say “please be honest with me” but when it comes to actually doing it, the tune changes. Honesty and relationships. How far do you go? What do you consider to be too much information? I don’t know about you but I find that sometimes it’s very difficult to reveal some things and i’m sure that i’m not the only one in this boat. We all ask questions like , what if things go wrong, what if they reject me? At the same time we worry about what will happen when your partner gets the information from elsewhere.
What am I getting at? Don’t hide things from your partner because guilt will haunt you until you do, and when you feel guilty, you worry and when you worry ,you stress and when you stress ,you stress your partner and when you stress your partner, you stress the relationship. Do you catch the drift? When you stress the relationship say goodbye to happily ever after.
So what do you do when you feel some things are better left unsaid? I would say if relationship is strong, it will be able to withstand any storm and i’m not just saying this for the sake of passing time. I must admit that they may be arguments and a bit of anger as a reaction to the information you share ,but if a relationship is strong you are sure that it will heal. When you have the guts to tell your partner everything , what you are actually saying is that you are sure about the relationship and when you are not open with each other it means you are not confident. I was about to say “it may mean you are not confident” but I’ve realized that the word “may” does not quite describe it. If you can not share everything with your partner it means the relationship is fragile and such a relationship will break one way or the other even for the most insignificant reason.
In short ,total honesty is a need in relationships but like most things there are rules to it:

• Don’t ask questions if you are not prepared to hear the honest truth. When you feel the need to know something make sure you are ready for whatever you are told.
• Don’t use the truth against you partner at some later stage . Don’t bring up the past . Leave it where it belongs, in the past.
• When you decide to share information don’t give half truth otherwise there is no point. Either you tell it all or tell nothing at all..

I’d like to leave you with a special recipe for true love : 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Saneliso