Do What You Love To Do

Work, Home, Life...

“Do what you love to do” is one of the most basic productivity tips of all.  The fact is that you’ll be much more productive when you do work you enjoy. Unfortunately, this tip is as obvious as it is ignored.

Doing work you love is not remotely the same thing as doing work you find moderately pleasant either. When you’re working in a field you love, your motivation is usually high because you feel passionate about what you’re doing. You don’t have to push yourself just to get going each day. You wake up in the morning already motivated and certain that you are going to do something you love.

One usually works at a fast tempo when you enjoy your work. You’ll also do better quality work, and high-quality work is more efficient than low-quality work. Low-quality work generates inferior results and often has to be redone.

It’s a waste of time trying to be productive in a field you don’t enjoy. Such a struggle is a complete waste of your life. Why subject yourself to such punishment? You deserve better!

I’ve heard hundreds of different excuses for why people claim they can’t do what they love — not enough money, no time, not good enough, wife won’t let me, etc. They can all be condensed down to two words: “I’m scared.”

The people who are doing what they love were also scared. They could all come up with the same excuses. But at some point they decided it was unacceptable to have their lives dictated by fear, so they opted to face their fear and push through it. They decided to overcome their problems instead of turning them into excuses. Those who remain stuck still allow their fear to rule them.

Ultimately it’s a choice. Either you commit to doing what you love, or you don’t. Which side do you think involves the most suffering?

7 Tips to Being a Great Conversationalist…

"What did you mean?"

Over the years I have been told that I am easy to talk to and have good conversation skills. I guess that is because I am a peoples person, I just love meeting new people and having conversations with them on just about anything that may come up. It didn’t always used to be like this though, I have read a couple of books and been fortunate enough to know some brilliant conversationalists and learnt from them how to improve my own conversational and communication skills. How can you improve your conversational skills to become a welcome sight at every party and social event you attend? Here are some tips that might help.

1) Ask questions

The truth is that most people prefer to talk about themselves and are hardly interested to hear about the other person or people in the conversation. Asking non-threatening questions is a great way to start and refresh conversations. If you know someone moderately well then you should be aware of some of their interests so questions about these interests is a good way to start. As you get to know people better you can begin to ask more searching questions like “What is your greatest ambition in life?” or “What is the most challenging thing you have ever had to face?”

By asking questions you engage people and draw them in. It is said that small minds talk about people, moderate minds talk about events and great minds talk about ideas. By all means start the conversation with some small talk but once it is going be prepared to introduce some questions relating to issues and ideas.

2) Listen

A simple fact is that good conversationalists are good listeners. The key is to listen attentatively whether you are with one person or with a group of people. Also, when you listen you learn. When you are speaking you are not learning anything new. Make a conscious effort to focus on what people say. Show that you are genuinely interested by asking questions that support and develop the conversation; “What do you mean exactly?”, “What happened next?”, or “How did you feel about that?” I discussed more on this in a recent post called The Platinum Rule.

By listening and observing in a group situation you can time your contribution to bolster the current conversation or move it forward to something new and interesting.

3) Give compliments

Remember to give compliments whenever you can, and do it sincerely because people will know if you are just trying to flatter them.  If someone looks smart or has lost weight or has a stylish new haircut then show that you have noticed by giving a genuine compliment.

4) Keep yourself current with topical issues

It is important to keep up to date on key current issues and topics in the news, entertainment, sports and politics. You should be ready to comment with questions, ideas, facts and opinions on the issues that other people are interested in. You can do this by seeing a few of the latest movies, read some of the most popular books, read the newspapers, watch the news, keep up with some major sports stories and watch some TV – but not too much:-) You do not need to slavishly follow every program but if someone asks you what are your favourite TV programmes then you should be able to list some popular and serious program and justify what it is you like about them.

Make your points with conviction, evidence and, if possible, humour. In a social environment be careful not to become belligerent or cantankerous. In general it is best to avoid really sensitive or controversial topics especially if they risk offending people’s personal feelings.

5) Be Funny

One thing I love to do is make people laugh and also have a good laugh myself. There is a place for serious discussion and there is a place for humour, so be ready to contribute in either environment. Be bold enough to add your comments and witticisms and carefully watch peoples reactions to see whether you are hitting the right note. Have a stock of funny stories. Do not force them into the conversation but rather have them ready when you get the cue or when there is an opening to use them. Personal anecdotes relating to unusual experiences and misfortunes that have happened to you often go down well. Jokes, quotes and other people’s witty remarks can also be used sparingly and with acknowledgement. Remember to laugh at other people’s funny stories, even if you have heard them before, but never give away someone else’s punch line.

6) Speak Clearly

When you speak, say what you have to say with clarity and enthusiasm. Don’t mumble your words, or rush through them or whisper so quietly that people have to strain to hear them. Good conversationalists are clear, articulate, and easy to understand. They use interesting metaphors and visual images. Keep your sentences short and to the point.

7) Enjoy yourself

Remember to just be yourself and don’t try to be anything that you are not. Relax and enjoy the occasion whatever it might be. People prefer to mix with the happy and good-natured rather than grumpy and miserable people. Have fun and really enjoy meeting new people at every opportunity.

HE WILL NEVER SAY THIS TO YOU!

Relationships..

I must admit that the male species continues to intrigue me. I was hoping that one day I would get to a point where I  knew all there is to know about men but then I realized maybe I will never get that information because men don’t share. There are certain things that men wish woman knew about them but guess what, they will never tell. I took the liberty to draw conclusions about males from my own experiences and from observing other people.

Number 1: The reason why he doesn’t call you when he says he will is because he doesn’t see the need to. You know why? Because he knows that you will call him at least fifteen times that day. Bottom line let him miss you. No matter how strong the urge is, don’t pick up that phone, don’t sms, give him a break. GIVE HIM A CHANCE TO CALL YOU…

Number 2: Men still like being the hunter and not the hunted. It doesn’t matter which century you live in, whether it’s 1900 or 2009 men still like to do the chasing. It ain’t right. I know you can argue and say it has worked for some so it must be right but you can also drive a car with your feet if you want to but it does not make it right.

Number 3: Nag nag nag. It doesn’t work. ladies you need to find a better way
of communicating what you want. Don’t be a nag. enough said.

Number 4: They can’t read your mind. There are some things that you need to S-P-E-L-L O-U-T. A few men if any are interested in guessing games so you need to say what you think they need to know.

Number 5: They still love to hang with the guys. Just because you are dating him does not mean he need to be stuck on you the whole time. Give him time to be with his friends and make time for yours too.

Number 6: If he met you when you were wearing stilettos you’d better make sure that you wear them most of the time. The point is, the fact that you have him does not mean you need to let go of your looks. Do the hair, the nails, change the wardrobe if you have to. Take care of yourself. When you don’t care their eyes tend to wander. Can I get a witness?

Number 7: It doesn’t matter how many men you attract in a short period of time but if you are barely dressed, you can be sure that what the men have for you is lust not love. Men are excited by sight but that is all there is to it. When the lust is over it he is done with you. If you dress to seduce that is all you will ever do, seduce and nothing else. Don’t expect a better deal out of it.

Number 8: They don’t like having take away every day. Develop a strong relationship with the pots and stove.

Number 9: To all our young married ladies, the abstain rule only applies before marriage. Ladies you have power and everybody knows that but don’t abuse it or punish the poor man because he will run so fast you wont be able to catch him.

These are just my thoughts and observations. Feel free to add yours to the list.

Yours Truly,

Sannie